The football season kicks off Saturday and I couldn’t be more Meh, I resent the pubs being took over by staring young men, pausing from their silent vigil to shout and gesticulate wildly or repeat exactly what the commentators just said, I hate having my manhood measured by how much or how little I care or know about any given team and that being the only way you are allowed to interact with other men your age is through the medium of the sport. I have never really understood why the pubs can’t play music at the same time as a match or why the game has to on so long. I already want my pubs back.

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