*I don’t know what it is that compels me to write here. I was just upstairs in the SleepHole arting my fingers off in time for Deadline Monday. After a couple of hours I just needed to be down here feeling the keys underneath my fingers and venting the words that make up the background static of my thoughts. I don’t really have anything to say (do I ever?). There is some of me that hates this following piece, its light it’s fluffy and ultimately of no real worth. It’s not a heartfelt confession, a plea for help, a call to arms. The other part of me likes it a lot partly because it was written in a “land art” lecture and mainly because it articulates something i’ve often thought.*

Some people are cat people and some people are dog people, nothing new or original there, I just want to go down on record as being a full-bore cat person. I like cats and so far cats like me, look at a cat, you see there is a quiet intelligence behind a cats eyes that is glaringly absent from a dogs, I don’t mind dogs, I just find obedience without intelligence worthless. Dogs are the battered wives of the animal world “one day he’ll change” dull watery eyes say as they settle for any scraps of attention thrown their way.

Love from a cat is earned, part of a bargain struck from the outset “feed me” a cat says “stroke me just right, let me sleep wherever I want, and one day I might, just might, if your lucky, sleep on your lap”. Plus cats earn there keep, I defy anyone to feel at least a little bit flattered when a cat deposits a still twitching mouse corpse at your feet, obviously whatever your feeling is a little tempered by the, what scientists are now calling, ohmygodwhatthefuckisthat?! factor.

Yes cats are aloof, and yes they are demanding in fact stroking a cat is like fucking a really demanding woman (and just as satisfying most of the time). Cats are in charge when it comes to fuss ”you’re not doing it right, leave your hand there I will brush against YOU” *looks at you* “and now behind the ear” *rolls over* “and now the stomach, harder harder BITCH”.

Maybe I like cats more because there independent and deep down I know I’m not responsible enough to have a animal rely on me as much as a dog would, or maybe secretly I hate myself and don’t think I’m worthy of a dogs devotion. Whatever. I’m sure there’s going to be a few people that disagree, which is good. Y’all know where the comment button is.